(My first pic with Olivia)
DAY 2 - December 6, 2011
Ok so I rushed back from home to get some stuff and when I got to the hospital, Oliva was already roomed in. I didn't know that baby's would be roomed in that quick but we had to adjust. It was especially hard for Bernice up until today because she's allergic to pain relievers so she's been enduring the post delivery pain the whole time. It's really heartbreaking.
Anyway, when I arrived, my best friend Hatch and her boyfriend was already there and they helped me with some tips since Mark was once a nurse and they were so kind to even write everything down so I won't forget (THANKS GUYS!).
This day was actually transition day for me as a dad. Good thing both the lolas were there to help me out to learn the ropes. They're happy doing it anyway... you know how lolas are :) They guided me when I first changed the diaper and all the other "parenting" stuff needed to care for a baby. They should know! It's actually what I keep telling Bernice regarding all the stuff for sale shoved down parents these days... I tell her "we're here right? We're alive and well. Our parents were able to bring us up living a simple life. So we really don't need those anymore." And it's true.
It was actually a long day since we were now living it. The baby was really there to be cared for. Plus the fact that of course, some friends came over during the day to visit. It would've been easy but as I mentioned earlier, Berns was in pain the whole day due to her not being able to take meds for pain :(
Unfortunately, at the end of the day, the lolas had to go home so it was all daddy from that time because Berns was stuck in bed. It was tiring but fun.
OLIVIA NOTES: When she was roomed in, she had a really nasty scratch wound on her cheek and above her lips :( her fingers must've slipped out while she was in the nursery and accidentally scratched herself. Also, this is the day I came up with her favorite song, "Bouncing Baby Girl."
REALIZATIONS: Before my day ended around dawn the next day, while I was eating Longganisa (of all meals), it suddenly sunk in. I finally felt that I was a dad. The sudden flood of emotions that I was hoping to feel the moment the baby came out arrived a little over a day late. It actually made me tear up a bit feeling and knowing that I'm now a dad and with all the love I have for my baby Olivia now, it made me tear up looking into the future that she'll one day grow up and she'll leave me when she gets married. I know it's kind of funny thinking about it this early but I really can't put to words why it made me feel that way. Maybe also it made me relate to my dad to my eldest sister. I mean, if this is how much I feel for my baby only a day in, how much worse must it have hurt for him when we lost my sister in an accident. I'm sure he, like myself now, suddenly remembered the nights he was carrying or singing her to sleep. It really saddened me.
Also, you can stare at your baby for hours and not get tired of it. I remember when I was the one who had to look after Olivia late at night so Bernice can sleep. I had to sing to her, carry her, and dance with her in my arms, and I didn't get tired and didn't realize I was already doing it for hours.
I'm now a dad. I won't try to be the "best dad in the world" but i'll try to be the best dad for my Olivia and I pray it turns out ok :)
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Note: Visitors that day were Hatch with Mark, Hope and Shanna, Ja, Steph and her family.
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