Short Break

I'll be taking a few days off from the blog to attend to my grandmother's funeral. I'll be back writing next week!

Have a blessed weekend everyone!

Cy

Another Checkup

We went for our routine monthly checkup again yesterday for the baby and by this time, I figured it would be nice to fill you in on the progress and also share some tips for your own checkups if you haven't done any yet. 

The baby's fine and has a strong heartbeat. His/Her size is just perfect and I'm glad to report that my wife is not overweight. She's managed to control her appetite and the Doctor is very happy with that. She's approaching her 7th month already so we're almost there!

Anyway, over the course of 7 months, the checkups have of course progressed as well. We all start with the ultrasound, the baby's first photograph, and as changes in your wife's body appear in the first and 2nd tri-sem, different scenarios may come up during checkups. In our case, Bernice initially had this bad case of allergies, wherein she'd find herself scratching all throughout the day and there'd be dark rash spots all over her body. That was very difficult for her but they say it often happens to pregnant women. I think hers lasted for almost a month that we also had to consult a dermatologist to prescribe some medicine for the itch because she couldn't sleep anymore. As I also wrote in an older post, she also started getting back pains and as the months progresses, it will seem to get worse and you should be there to give your wife long back massages.

A little tip is to write down things that come up over the month before your next checkup. This will remind you about it and don't forget to write questions if you're wondering about something. Google will give you tons of answers regarding some pregnancy issues but it's best to get the answers direct from your doctor since they know your wife's condition more than anybody.

Cy

Of Toilets and Ceramics

CREDIT

Blogging can be quite a chore especially if you run out of things to say but can we really? Sometimes, yes especially since you want topics that can be helpful and beneficial for anyone reading the blog. But I gave it some thought and decided that it's really not entirely up to me. Some topics I may feel boring or uninteresting may just be the perfect topic to be read by a number of people reading it. It's really something. 

So now I come to today's entry. Toilets? What? Yes.

I figured, why not share the hours we've spent in Wilcon just choosing toilets. You read it right. Hours with an S. It's really something different when you're already buying for yourself. It's easier to just point and choose something if you were just suggesting but if it was already for your own use, it's funny to read but it really is hard!

Why?

Well, you're considering the look, the price, etc. It actually made me realize that something as mundane as a toilet bowl can take you hours just to choose. Of course there are nicer designs and such but if you really think about it, do you even notice it when you pee or do the number 2? Really? Do you notice if the toilet is one piece? Do you notice that it's wrapped around? Usually, people just lift the lid and do their thing. I don't know if people really take the time to examine a toilet on how it looks.

But since there are tons to choose, I hope I can help you out to save you at least a few minutes when you do get to the point that you go out and choose your own. 

Today there are a lot of toilet designs and features. I used to think it was just flush and seatcover/lid and that's it. Would you believe me if I said you can get something as low as around Php4,000 and as high as Php400,000? You read that right. 400 HUNDRED THOUSAND pesos. A toilet more expensive that all our old cars combined!

Anyway! You can get toilets standalone or packaged with the lavatory and all the fixtures. If i remember correctly, you can get one around Php 6,000 only! Of course the price now raises depending on the brand and the features. 

I'll let you decide on the brand because there are a number of them. I'll just let you in on some features.

- The basic one has one flush and the cover/lid. Now you can also opt for those with 2 types of flushing which is said to save more water in the long run since you can choose how much water is needed perhaps you did a  number 1 or 2.

- There's also the differences in the cover/lid wherein the basic one just opens and closes quickly. There's also something called "soft close" so that when you close it shut, it doesn't slam onto the ceramic but instead somehow stops midway and goes down slowly. 

- There's also this thing called one or two piece. We all grew up with the 2 piece type of toilet and it works right? The one piece models look good and at the same time, is said to be more hassle free since it can avoid leaks... so they say.

- Design-wise there's also those where you can't see the intestine-like shapes of the pipes just below the seat. I don't know what it's called but I'll just call it wrap around. It's cleaner looking and it's easier to clean. That's the nice part but of course, it's a little bit more expensive.

- Back to the flush, there are more expensive models that have really strong flushing power while keeping the water consumption low so you might also want to look into that. I just forgot what it's called as well.

- In the real high end (around the hundreds of thousands) however, there are sensors already and all these controls like a TV remote. It has heating for the seats, it even has sensors where it knows the user is coming so it opens the lid and closes it after use on its own. Talk about spoiled ass! There are so much more in the high end, but I doubt you'll be interested in getting one since it's not practical anymore. seriously... a toilet as expensive as a car!? But then again, there are people who do buy those. My wife knows one!

- and of course, don't forget the color. If you decide not to get a package, just make sure you at least try to get the brand the same since different brands use different types of white so if you mix it with another brand, you might think it's the same white and then you end up with 2 mismatched items. We experienced that before we bought. We liked a toilet from one brand and the lavatory for another but I insisted to see it side by side. I HAD to make the salesman carry the lavatory to where the toilet was so that I can see it side buy side and true enough, the type of white didn't match. So make sure your color matches especially if you go non-white.

So there, I hope you were able to pick up a thing or two from my experience in choosing a proper throne. I had to buy 2 times so I guess that's a little bit more experience than most fathers out there! haha 

We ended up not getting packages so we can customize which pieces we wanted... having a wife who's an interior designer also influences the decisions! hehe So we picked a set for the guest room and recently, for the master's bedroom. It was an experience but it was a fun one. Besides, it's fun going around Wilcon :)

Cy

 

Cravings

Cravings... in Filipino, we all associate this with "paglilihi" where our wives would ask for specific types of food as their appetites spring back after the first tri-sem. Fortunately on my end, my wife doesn't really go for something specific and just stuff herself with it. Now I can't remember if I entered something similar to this post but from my observation and to my wife's confession, we believe it's cheese. What's good about it though is that it's anything with cheese so the search isn't really for something specific. She may ask for cheese ice cream, or ensaymada, or cheese roll, or anything with cheese. I'm actually thankful that it's that and not some weird item or some weird combination of food like maybe anchovies on bananas or something.

What are the cravings of your wife? One thing I also noticed is sometimes when it's hard to find particular things she looks for, I then offer her some possible alternatives just to satisfy particular cravings. Most of the time, she can live with the alternative especially if it's hard to find or stores are closed already. Just make sure that you strike a balance between giving her particular ones and compromising if there's a need. Our wives may be craving so much but I'm sure with talking with them and letting them know and feel that you are also trying as much to give in, our wives will understand if at times you can't give what they want. Don't be too hard on yourselves. The key is making sure you also give in most of the time to appease her and not just come up with excuses everytime she asks for something. That's where misunderstandings and feeling of neglect will try to creep in and we don't want that.

Back to my wife, I know cheese is so common but what else can you recommend that comes with cheese? :)

Cy

Boy or Girl?

When asked if we want a boy or a girl, our first answer is most definitely "any" as long as the baby is healthy and strong. At first, I was personally open to anything and still am. But of course, from time to time, I may lean more on a preference. 

Most of the time though, I hope that it's a boy. Why? It's a funny thing. I want it to be a boy so that our next child (hopefully a girl) will have a big brother who will look after her and be enough to scare the boys. Yeah I'm serious :)

A close second (as if there's a third choice) is a baby girl. I know that to most dads, they'd want that baby girl since they form that bond that's really something, hence the term daddy's girl hehe

Well, they say boys are easier to manage coz girls need so much attention and stuff but then again, they say boys are harder to manage in terms of their attitude and tantrums hehe It's a balancing act I guess either if we end up with a boy or a girl. The important thing is that whatever God gives you is the blessing that he wants you to have and that's all that matters.

So there, a little insight on what we really wanted. Excited about this gift God has for us :)

Cy

 

 

Your Driving...

Kids drive fast. That's a given. 

I remember when I was younger, I loved the speed but I never was the daredevil type who drove 180-200 on weekends. I was still quite aware of the dangers. As I grew older though, I noticed that my max speed slowly went down bit by bit. It's not that I just grew older but because step by step, there were responsibilities already. 

First when I had a girlfriend. Now, I had to be twice safer since i was already responsible for a life in the passenger seat. 

Then now, as fathers, we now have more than 1 life we're responsible for other than our own. We have our child to consider and as much as the speed gives us a rush, we have to make those changes in the way we drive. 

This is just a simple reminder for all you dads out there who are used to driving fast before. You may not be aware of it but you may have carried it over into marriage and now into fatherhood. Remember that safety for the family is more important than getting quickly to a meeting, etc, or to just enjoying the speed. Next time you go out and drive, notice your speed reading and adjust your driving if needed. It may take time but it's a step in the right direction.

Cy 

 

Doppler Rockin

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So depending on which trimester you are in, you'll definitely have this chance to listen to the baby's heartbeat. I believe the doctor's using a doppler (machine?). This seems to be a super microphone that can let you hear your baby's heartbeat through a little speaker as you saw in the video if you watched it. This is actually the third visit where we had a listening session. The first time, I didn't know we were doing it. The 2nd time, I forgot my recorder. This is the 3rd and successful time hehe

It's quite a feeling hearing your kid's heartbeat. Though I think I was more psyched during the first check up months back when I first saw the tiny tiny heartbeat on that ultrasound screen :)

I'm not sure if you got to understand the video much but of course the heartbeat is pretty easy to distinguish. There's some loud "noises" and it's just the baby moving its position. I think my baby is microphone shy hehe he/she might be a drummer hehe

I also brought my nicer audio recorder to record this coz I'm writing a tune using my baby's heartbeat hehehe that's something to look out for :)

Cy

Why I Don't Want To Know Our Baby's Gender

Photo: Segundo E. Romero Jr. 

I don't know if you guys have noticed but I always put him/her, he/she in my blog entries. Partly because we still don't know the gender but the truth is, we could have it checked already and I could have announced it in the blog but I don't want to know. 

I'm sure you're wondering how the photo I put above is connected right?

Well, if any of you saw our wedding, the theme was Filipiniana. I love my country and I am proud to be a Filipino and somehow in some aspects of my life, I want to live that. Of course, it's in no connection to my reason, that was just a side note. You'll find out later...

I don't want to know the gender because I want it to be a surprise. At first, Bernice wanted to find out but I was insistent that I wouldn't want to know. She was telling me that it's hard to prepare when we don't know the gender but I was still insistent. I'm glad she later saw my view and we're now together in this. She even wanted to just find out and then she said she'll just keep it from me but I told her it's impossible for me not to know if she ends up buying blue baby clothes or pink depending if it's a boy or girl!

Why do I want it to be a surprise? Well, I want it old skool. I want to do it how it was before and to know on the day itself. It's just me but I feel it's better that way. I want to do it like the old days or in the provinces... now you know why I used that photo hehe

Why?

Well, I feel that among all the feelings, emotions, thoughts and such on the day of the delivery itself, it would be nice to add on that "surprise" in finding out what the gender of the baby is. I feel that it would be a pleasantly overwhelming experience that the moment the baby's born and they tell you it's a boy or it's a girl, not only will you get that surge of emotions that comes with having a baby, but you'll also be flooded with all the thoughts you will have for the baby once you find out the gender. Suddenly your mind will be racing with two paths to take: one if it's a girl and another if it's a boy. Once the doctor tells you which one, then it's only at that very moment will your mind take it's step in the right direction and I feel that it's going to multiply the whole experience of having a baby.

If you find out the gender like 3 months before, you would've had that time to digest everything. You would have also given it much thought as to what your life will be, now that you have either a girl or a boy. By the time the baby comes, part of knowing the gender beforehand somehow doesn't bring that extra "kick" in knowing on the day itself. 

But that's just me. I'm sure each one of us has their own take on it. But if you really haven't given it much thought yet, try to do it the old skool way and I'm sure the surprise will be worth the wait!

Cy

 

First Kick

Ok this entry has been pending for way too long now...

I was so psyched the first time I felt our baby kick. If you fathers haven't reached that point yet, prepare for a real shocker... well, not really. It was just a really nice feeling.

Imagine, your first connection with your baby...

So there I was making music in bed on the computer and Bernice goes "feel my tummy!" and the moment I set my hand on her tummy, the baby gave a really strong and surprising kick. It wasn't one of those little kicks that you feel a little push. It was one edgy and strong one and I'd like to think that our baby knew we were connecting for the first time and he/she wanted to make his/her mark properly with a nice strong kick saying "Hey dad, feel this!"

And so it was that from that moment on, you'll be able to feel the kicks once the baby's up. It's a fun feeling. Don't get frustrated at times when suddenly it's daddy trying to feel the tummy and the baby suddenly stops. It always happens to me as well. Just wait it out there's always time to feel it. 

Just make sure you make it a point to feel it even once before your wife gives birth.

Make that first connection :)

Cy

Baby Music

As a musician, of course I've already given some thought as to how my baby will grow up with music and especially in music making. But during the days he or she is in my wife's womb, I'm curious as to what he hears. 

We always hear things about how babies should hear classical music while they're in the womb, which results to more intelligent kids. I don't think it's just made up. I mean, I know how complicated it is to create classical music so I bet people who hear it can at the very least get some of that "intelligent creativity" embedded in timeless pieces of orchestra music.

I remember my friend telling me he experimented on it and the kid who listened to classical music turned out to be an A student all the way, while the other one who was exposed to alternative types of music struggles in school. So I guess there really is some truth to it! :)

Studies say (so I've been told) that metal and hard rock gives the opposite to the baby compared to classical but of course, it's not like they turn out bad or anything. I really don't know. 

What I wonder now is... what can be the effect of my baby hearing a lot of electronic music :) I mean, I remember one time we were driving and I was playing some tech house in the car and Bernice goes, "the baby's dancing now!" I'm hoping he/she will turn out good in math the opposite of how the dad is hehehe why? Well, with the 4 to the floor sound of house, the bpms, and the structure and sound that seems like a clock ticking with precision, I'm thinking it would be awesome if the effect of house music turns out to be in the calculations and exact measurements and such hehe But that's just me. 

At the end of the day, he/she still gets the classical dose from time to time so I hope the balance helps. But then again, he/she will grow up in a music-filled home and I do hope he/she gets into it :)

Cy

Visiting The In Laws

CREDIT

This can be a touchy topic for some because some people hate their in laws, and some love them. I am just blessed that I love mine. And despite the negative feeling you may have about them, they STILL are your in laws and it's best that you let your wife spend time with the family she loves. 

Yes you may say that you are your wife's new family and that you are now the priority but you also have to remember that you don't throw away "respect" to the in laws once you marry their child/sister/etc. Regardless of how you feel, you should still respect them and give them honor for who they are in the life of your spouse. Remember that they sacrificed a LOT just to bring up a child as great as the one you married and for that you SHOULD BE THANKFUL!

Always make it a point to pay them a visit to show them honor. It may not be a trip to the park but it's a trip your wife may want to take and you should be there by her side as she does. 

You may say that it's easy for me to say that because I love my in laws (and I do!). But don't look at it like there's a choice! There isn't! Giving them honor is part of the package when you married their child so you better man up and perhaps take that extra step to get closer to them or to show them something great they can see in you if there's some tension. 

I know someone who has to make up stories just to sneak out of the house to visit the parents because their spouse doesn't want to visit them and I think that's really sad when the very person whom you expect to be "THE" family to you would try to keep you away from the family who brought you up :(

So if you're still hesitant, take a leap. It's fun. You don't need to go there bringing great gifts. Just "BE" there and it can be a start of something fresh! 

Cy

 

My Wife... future mom and artist.

Look at what she drew :)

Cy

Home Massage

As our wives go through toward the end of the 2nd trimester, she may start to experience a lot of lower back pain. Doctor says it's the body's way to prepare for the growth of the baby. If I remember correctly, it's caused by the softening of the ligaments (not sure) on her lower back. By this time, she will have pains mostly daily, which is quite bad. It actually pains me to see my wife in it when the pain attacks. We as husbands, should at this time try to help her out as much as we can. I always try to remind her the reason behind it which is of course the baby and to just encourage her that the baby is coming soon since we really can't do much about the pain. 

So as she goes through this stage in the pregnancy, we should learn to give her a good massage to help ease the pain because it usually happens at night while she sleeps and so you should be on call for that to help her sleep through the night especially since she may also have a hard time sleeping because the baby inside is awake. 

Cy

My Kid's an Azkalero

My wife often is kept up by the baby waking up inside the tummy around midnight up to 3-4am. All throughout the day, the kid is up and out from time to time but one thing she often talks about is how strong the baby kicks. I often tell her that the baby takes it from me because as a football player, I was one of the guys in the team who kicked hard so I really believe he/she takes that from me hehe

And with that, I believe he/she will be a football player. 

Watch out football world :)

Cy

In The Womb

There's a film special made by National Geographic named In The Womb, which is very special. 

I remember watching it when it was shown on TV but a friend of my wife lent us her copy to watch and it's a whole journey into pregnancy where you can pick up TONS of information about what your wife goes through and most especially how your baby is growing inside. 

The best thing with it is watching it together with your wife. I did and it was a real blessing to do so because you both can share that time in learning together about your baby. The understanding and knowledge you pick up from it also let's you both digest everything that's happening.

If you can get a copy, please do so and it'll be a real eye opener. 

Cy

Talking To The Baby

It may be weird talking to a tummy but remember that your kid inside hears you :)

Baby's will most definitely be more familiar with the moms voice but dad's will come a close 2nd because those are they voices they're most used to.

This is actually the first bonding moments you can have with your baby before they're delivered and it's nice to have that connection early on. They may not understand anything but the familiarity built during those times go a long way so go ahead and talk to your baby. 

You know what's better? Singing to them :)

Cy

Name Game

 

Names either make or break us during childhood so as parents, we try our best to come up with the best name we can for our kids. Of course, it's that part of preparenthood where we also make sure that we also like the name that we give them and not just anything we came up with in a minute.

With the challenge ahead of us, I then set out to find a name for our child to be. Now there are tons of sources people get their names from and I'm sure some parents have made lists even when they were young. I know coz I did it as well but as i grew older, I wasn't feeling those names anymore. 

For you who are still drawing a blank with names, I hope some of these might help. Here are some source suggestions from observations and later on I'll add some I actually used while searching. 

FAMILY MEMBERS: We all know this and some of us were named after some of our relatives. My dad's also Cyril so I really should know! haha But yeah, you may have some relatives you look up to or some relatives who may have left a mark in the lineage of your ancestry that you may want to name your kid after so it's worth asking around. It's also a nice way to learn about your family's past.

HEROES: Some people name their kids after heroes or saints or prominent people so you may also want to consider looking into this.

ONLINE: Of course, the first port of call but with the results you'll get, it can get overwhelming so it's good to start in small scale (like with the family first) before just diving in. It's also worth reminding that it also helps to be specific like for example search for what you're into like can it be spanish names? American names? etc.

I could've searched through the ones i mentioned like family members, heroes or online but I wanted to do some research somewhere else...

BIBLE: I wanna spend a bit of time on this... Regardless of what name you choose, it's nice to have a bible name for your kid may it be the main one or a 2nd or 3rd one. Names of characters in the bible actually have meanings behind them and those meanings stand as declarations toward your child. So for example, you won't name your child Babel since it means confusion. But you can call him Boaz meaning a pillar of strength. I'm sure you get the picture. Though also check origins of names you're considering since some may not really be taken straight from the bible but its origin is.

BOOKS: You can get baby name books anywhere. My advice though is to visit 2nd hand book shops because you'll find fresh books that parents got rid off after finding a name they liked. It's not something most decide to keep so check those first and you'll save money, which you can use for something else for the baby.

APPS: For you iphone/Ipod/Ipad users, you may want to consider checking out dedicated apps out there. There are a lot of free apps and some paid, which you can download. They've proved to be VERY useful. We actually named one of our dogs from a name we found in one of the apps :) I wanted to list down the names of the apps but it turns out 3 of the apps have the same name... "Baby Names." So it's a real giveaway. I bought the app "Bible Names" to look for bible names and meanings, which is also a really helpful reference app.

So there! I hope these have helped a bit to guide you through your search. If not, well, the image above has 2 suggestions you may wanna use :)

Cy